Buzz Interviews Melissa Lunardini of Tribal Grief, LLC
As a child I was exposed to death, divorce, an incarcerated drug-addicted parent, homelessness, abuse, abandonment, poverty, hunger, gangs, and absentee caregivers; making grief a big part of my life’s narrative. Much of my grief was disenfranchised (not socially acknowledged or supported) so I reconciled my pain alone. I was a kid who lacked access to resources and appropriate adult guidance and support. My coping mechanisms manifested in an unhealthy way at an early age.
As a teen, I had formed a serious drug addiction which led to a drug overdose that almost ended my life when I was 17. That near-death experience forced me into reflecting on what my purpose was. I often talk about the power that one adult can have on a child’s life because I know first hand how true it is. After my drug overdose, I had one teacher sit me down with tears in his eyes and say “Melissa, I was so scared that you were going to die. I don’t think you know how many people would have been devastated by your death. I want you to know that you’re better than this, you’re smarter than this, and your life is more important than this.” It was the first time in my life that I felt seen and that was a powerful experience. It changed my life in an instance. It was in that moment when a teacher saw me for who I was and who I could be that my purpose had been carved out for me. I knew that I wanted to work with youth who had experienced heavy and hard life challenges like me. I wanted to be an adult who would SEE them.
After graduation, I went straight into college to become a teacher. Focused and determined to work kids who were like me. By the time I was 21 I started teaching at my Alma Mater. I kept my room open during lunch so students would have a safe place to come, I set up mini support groups for girls who were struggling with self-harm or suicidal idealization, I used my prep periods to play sports with the athletes, I even took up coaching the high school softball team all to connect. I even started volunteering at a local center for grieving children and teens who experienced the death of a loved one during my free time. THIS WAS MY PIVOTAL MOMENT.
It was through volunteering with grieving children and teens that I got to sit and just listen. I fell in love with every human emotion (the good ones and the hard ones). I fell in love with vulnerability, courage, silence, weakness, and rawness. It was brutally beautiful. I knew then that my purpose was to figure out how I can do “this” forever and if I can’t personally do it forever, then figure out how I can help others do it.
Over the last 15 years, I have had the privilege to sit with thousands of children and teens and make them feel seen and heard. I have developed robust nationally known programs that serve these hurting hearts. I’ve trained endless amounts of professionals, caregivers, and volunteers on how to support bereaved youth.
Tribal Grief was developed to be a platform that brings services into local communities. As a grief and loss consultant with nearly 15 years of experience specializing in childhood bereavement, I am positioned to provide training to professionals and program development to agencies who serve bereaved children and teens.